Post by Deleted on Jun 27, 2016 22:24:48 GMT -6
So as amazing as last night was, I want to make sure that before I reveal to the world that I’ve finally been able to move on with my life, that I know for sure that this is real. Also, the person I want to speak too about this first is someone who I feel deserves to be the first to know, and he also knows Jen better than anyone.
I hope he takes this well, I know he’s already moved on himself and yeah, people will tell me that it’s none of his business who Jen ends up dating, but he’s my friend and her ex-husband, the father of her child so I want to make sure that he approves of this.
For my own personal reasons...
So I’m sitting here at Cafe Grumpy in New York, dressed in a pair of black high heeled shoes, a pair of tight fitting white denim jeans, a plain black strapped tank top and a black cap on backwards with ‘NY’ on the front of it in white.
With a cappuccino cupped in my hands, I take a sip from it as I await the arrival of Tyler. A cup of coffee with milk and sugar, just how he likes it resting on the table opposite me. I feel so happy right now, it’s weird because I seem to have a little more color in my pigmentation than normal, and honestly because of how happy I am is the only reason I can think why.
I spot Ty as he enters the place, dressed in a pair of black and white sneakers, a pair of baggy light blue denim jeans and a plain white T-shirt and a back brace, pushing himself along in a wheelchair due to his recent surgery I raise my hand and wave so he can see where I am and once he reaches me, I stand up with a huge smile on my face and embrace him in a careful hug.
“Hi honey! I’m so glad you came!”
"Well, it certainly took me a bit. Not exactly the easiest thing to move around to places."
“I bet...”
I move the chair opposite me over to another table, allowing him to move his wheelchair into that position before I retake my seat opposite him.
“So how have you been? Did the surgery go well? How are things going with you and Taryn?”
Jesus, Stacy! Slow the fuck down! I know you’re happy and excited but stop bombarding the poor guy with questions!
"Whoa, slow down! Heh, I've been well, the pain is starting to go down and I'll be starting full on rehab in a few weeks, I've had someone visit at home to do some preliminary stuff with me. And yeah the surgery went well, you should know this, you literally came and saw me for Father's Day with Zel when she brought Elena and that gift to me. And things with Taryn are well, still getting used to it a bit but that will probably take a while."
Of course I knew the surgery went well! Stupid Stacy! Stop being so damn giddy!
“Yeah, haha...sorry, I guess my mind’s been all over the place after last night...”
I let out a small, sharp chuckle before taking a large gulp of my cappuccino, my eyes darting around the place.
“I got you a coffee, by the way, just how you like it...”
Great conversation changer, Stacy. Bravo. At least it wasn’t boobs, your usual subject changer.
"Thanks Stace, glad to see you remembered."
Tyler takes a small sip, but I do notice he is raising his eyebrow looking at me as he drinks the coffee. After a moment, he sits down the cup, and smirks.
"You know, last time I remember seeing that look in your eyes, you felt embarrassed after doing naughty things in mine and Zel's room when you and Katie visited our home during that southern US VoW tour."
My cheeks immediately begin to feel warm as I begin playing with my hair, curling it around my finger.
“I...found someone. Last night I went out on a blind date and...I don’t think I’ve ever felt more in love with anyone in my entire life.”
"That's awesome to hear Stace! Hopefully this will be something a bit more permanent for you, I just hope you are making sure this is someone that you can really put emotional trust into. You don't need to just throw all the eggs in the basket this time."
“That’s the thing...even though it was meant to be a blind date...it ummm...ended up being with someone that I already know. Someone I know very...VERY well.”
Again I take another large gulp from my drink, it’s going to have to come out eventually, I can’t keep it hidden from him much longer.
"Really? Well, it's good to have someone you already have an idea about, but of course my words still stand. You knew Katie as well, and that ended up not working out. Being a bit calmer with some things will be better in the long run."
“It was Zelda...”
I couldn’t help but finally blurt it out. Once again, I hide myself behind my drink, avoiding eye contact with him and just waiting in this awkward silence for him to say something.
"You know what's funny...I'm not surprised. You said you needed to talk about something important with me, you had that look which gave me reason to dive into what this important thing was, and once you said date it all became pretty clear."
“I guess...if I was completely honest, deep down I probably always did love her the way I do now, but for obvious reasons I chose to ignore it and allow you two to focus on your relationship whilst I focused on mine...”
I let out a sigh of relief over finally being able to tell someone about this.
“And then...after what happened to the both of us with our respective relationships coming to an end. I guess I still refused to accept it for whatever reason...but then...we had that date and I just decided to stop fighting it and accept it.”
"To be fair...I always had this thought in the back of my head that you probably loved Zel more than I ever could have...at times I honestly felt jealous, sometimes spiteful. I'll admit at times I was legitimately afraid you were gonna take her from me. I appreciate that you never did though."
Placing my hand on top of his, I look deep into his eyes.
“I would never do that to one of my friends. No matter how much I may be in love with someone, Hell...even when I was still in love with Katie after she had found Claire, as much as I wanted her back, I never once thought about trying to take her away. I’m not that kind of person, I never want to ruin anything between two people who love each other...”
Tyler smiles and nods as he rubs against my hand.
"One oddly relieving thing about that whole situation, with Winter...it almost made me feel at ease thinking you might have actually had attractions to me and not Zel, even if it was obviously not true..."
I nod, smiling as I finish off my drink.
“Honestly Tyler, if I didn’t think of you too much as a friend...as a brother...and of course if I wasn’t more attracted to women than men, I probably would be attracted to you. You’re an amazing, loving, sweet guy who deserves all the happiness in the world...and I’m truly happy that you’ve found someone else to make happy, not only that but I’m also happy to know that you accept my new relationship with Jen. I swear to you that I will take care of her to the best of my ability...like I said, I’ve never been more in love with anyone ever. More than Matt...more than Tayla...even more than Katie...”
"Well hang on now, I never said I accepted it yet."
Tyler takes another sip of his coffee and smirks, cheeky bastard.
“Yeah well, who she dates is none of your bees wax anyway...”
Sticking my tongue out at him, we both share a small chuckle with one another.
“In all seriousness though, I just wanted you to be the first to know out of respect. With her being your ex-wife and especially with you having Elena with her. I know that when children are involved, it can be worrying for a parent when their ex gets into a new relationship when you know your kids will be around that person a lot.”
I lean forward, folding my arms and resting them on the table.
“Which is why I’m fine with Winter being Matt’s new partner in that sense, because as much as I may hate her for what she’s done to me and my loved ones. I know she adores my kids, and so for that...I’m thankful...”
"I mean, it's at least good to know Elena is gonna be with someone I trust just as much as myself and Zel. You've done so much for her, I know you will keep her safe and happy."
“Yeah, I will take care of her as if she were my own. And I can’t wait to introduce Nick and Chelsea to her too, they’ll absolutely love her.”
"How is all that going by the way? Any updates after the breakdown episode?"
“Well, hopefully if I don’t have anymore breakdowns between now and then, hopefully I’ll be able to get to see them in about a month or two at the very least. It sucks that I have to wait that long, but after what happened, it’s understandable. And as close as Angela and I have become, I don’t want her treating me differently because of that...and I know she wouldn’t do that anyway because of course, it could risk the safety of the kids.”
"Right. You'll get them back though. If anything, Zel being her super ray of positivity could be exactly what you need to get that extra influence to get the kids finally. Especially with you taking on a more motherly role with Elena."
Nodding, I smile at him.
“Yeah...and they need to meet their Uncle Tyler. Especially considering a certain little guy is his number one fan.”
"Hey, just say the word, and I'll get your little guy plenty of time to meet me."
“Of course you would, that’s why you’re one of the greatest men I’ve ever known.”
I then call over to the waitress for another cappuccino as we continue to chat, joke and laugh with one another, just spending some quality time together as friends.
Honestly, I never expected anything less from Tyler with telling him my news. I just wanted to make sure he knew about it based on the reasons I explained to him, mainly surrounding the future of Elena.
I’m so lucky to have such a wonderful man in my life...
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Ahh the hustle and bustle of New Yorkers coming to and from work, or just out shopping for groceries, gifts or just something special for themselves. I’ve always been a city girl, so the huge busy crowds have never bothered me, but of course I can understand how other people can get easily uncomfortable in this kind of environment.
But right now, no matter how many people may be out here, with the way I’m feeling right now, all it feels like is that I’m here alone with my sweet chinchilla and our little princess.
And I love them with all of my heart...
Heading through the huge city centre, dressed in a pair of black leather high heeled boots, a pair of black skin tight black leather trousers, a black Trivium The Crusade T-shirt, a black leather jacket and a plain black woollen hat, I walk arm in arm with Jen who is dressed in a pair of white high heeled shoes, a pair of dark blue tight fitting denim jeans, a plain white blouse and a light brown leather jacket.
Pushing Elena along in her buggy (one that has Elena facing us) both Jen and I begin pulling funny faces at her causing her to giggle a little bit which in turn makes us laugh as well as I rest my head onto my girlfriend’s shoulder.
“This just feels so right, Jen. Being here with you...arm in arm...together with Elena. My life feels almost perfect, all that’s missing is Nick and Chelsea and then...then my world will be complete.”
"I know...I'm just scared they won't like me though when they do meet me."
“Trust me, honey...they’re going to love you.”
"How do you know though? Knowing Veronica...ugh..."
“I know because even though they’ve been around that woman a lot, if she even tried to poison their minds with anything about either of us, then I doubt they would even want to see me. And the last I heard, they do want to see me...”
"Well...I just don't trust her...and I have a bad feeling they will hate me."
Jen frowns a bit as she looks down at the ground, sighing before looking back up to Elena and smiling.
"All else fails, I still have my angel."
“It’ll be okay, honey...I promise...”
I kiss her softly on the side of the head and stroke my hand through her hair a little.
“So can you remember if we needed anything? Like, for food?”
"Um, well I was thinking of trying my hand at making some steak for you if you don't m-"
“OH MY GOD! NO WAY!!!”
Our attention is suddenly diverted to the sudden female outburst coming from behind us. We turn around and as soon as we do, a young woman lunges at me, wrapping her arms around my neck. She must be nineteen at most, and she looks a little like a younger version of myself, a very alternative look about her.
“I CAN’T BELIEVE IT’S REALLY YOU!”
Breaking away from me, she looks over to Jen and her eyes light up as she embraces Jen as well, catching her off guard much like she did with me. Finally breaking away from her, both Jen and I look at one another before looking back to the young woman.
“I’m so sorry...I just...I can’t believe I’m meeting the two of you right now! You’re both...so awesome!
"W-Well thank you...certainly caught both of us a little off guard it seems, but it's nice to meet you as well."
She glances down at Elena and immediately places her hand onto her heart.
“Aww! This must be little Elena...she’s so beautiful, just like her Mommy...”
Quickly shooting a glance at the two of us, she composes herself.
“Oh, I’m sorry...I hope I’m not taking up your time?”
“Of course not, honey. We always have time for fans...what’s your name?”
“Felicity...”
Turning to Jen for a moment, she smiles before focusing back onto me.
“I just want to say that both of you have helped me through so much. I’m actually meeting up with my parents shortly and because of you guys, I’ve finally picked up the courage to come out to them as lesbian.”
"That's awesome to hear. Have you taken all the steps to make sure you'll at least be safe if the worst happens?"
“I have yes, but I’m hoping it won’t come to that...”
“If you want, we can stick around and be here with you for moral support if you need us too? We’re not in any rush...”
“Oh my God! Are you serious? That would be so awesome!”
Again, she wraps her arms around us, this time it’s both of us together.
"It's no problem at all. Stacy and I love to help wherever we can, whenever we can."
Breaking away from us, she smiles before glancing over our shoulders and waves as we look in the direction she’s waving and see a couple waving back, making their way over to us.
“That’s them...”
After a few moments, the couple reach us and Felicity hugs both of them before pointing over to us.
“Mom...Dad...this is Stacy Jones and Zelda Lawson. They work for VoW, you know the wrestling show I watch? Stacy’s my favourite wrestler and Zelda is one of the interviewers. They’re both awesome...and of course, Zelda’s baby daughter Elena is here too.”
Both her parents shake our hands, smiling and nodding at us. There’s a short awkward silence as Felicity glances over to the both of us, a hint of nervousness filling her expression.
Jen leans in close to Felicity and rubs her shoulders, nodding to her and whispering.
"We are right here, and we believe in you."
“Yeah, just take your time, honey...”
Nodding, she slowly takes in a deep breath and then exhales before looking at her parents.
“Okay here goes...Mom...Dad...I-I’m a...I’m a lesbian...”
A brief silence follows that statement, Felicity’s parents glance at one another before turning back to their daughter and immediately embrace her.
“Oh Felicity! Your mother and I will always love you, no matter what...”
“Of course we will, dear. You never needed to worry about telling us this...at all.”
"She was really scared, as any kid dealing with this side of the spectrum. She certainly is one of the lucky ones, thank you for accepting her."
Her father breaks away from the hug, his eyes red raw as tears roll down his cheeks. He glances at the two of us and looks as if he’s suddenly been hit with a realisation as he points to us both individually.
“I remember seeing you two on a show recently that Felicity was watching. You’re a couple yourselves, aren’t you? She idolizes both of you...a-and...I wouldn’t be surprised if you two were responsible for her being able to have the courage to tell us this. For that, I thank you both so much...you are both truly a major inspiration to so many people, you should both be very proud of yourselves.”
“Thank you, Sir...we...do our best.”
"Mhm...it's not an easy world for people to deal with sexualities that aren't 'straight.' I'm happy we were able to inspire her so much."
“I wish it were, ma’am. But that’s unfortunately the way this world works. But my wife and I will always accept our daughter no matter what. And once again, thank you for helping her.”
“You’re very welcome...”
Felicity is now crying into her mother’s shoulder as is her mother as her father softly rubs her on the back and smiles at us.
“Well, we better get back home...enjoy the rest of your day, ladies...”
"You guys too. Give her lots of love, she deserves it."
He nods before he helps guide his family away as we continue on our own way as well.
“Such a lovely family...”
Jen, instead of answering, blushes as she takes hold of my face and plants a deep, passionate kiss on my lips.
“Wow, okay...what was that for? Not that you have to have a reason...nor am I complaining of course, but that just came out of the blue.”
"It's because that right there...that kind of courage you give to people like her, something you do for so many people dealing with being gay. You doing that for them is such a big reason why I am forever constantly falling in love with you."
Smiling, I wrap my arm around her waist.
“Whenever something like that happens, I just...it make me so happy. All I’m doing is just living my life how I want to live it, and it boggles my mind that me simply just doing that is helping people in that way. But for that one, I can’t take all of the credit...you helped too, she said it herself.”
"Well, even you have helped me accept my own self more baby...you help so many people, thank you."
We share another passionate kiss one another before we continue with our day out shopping.
It always warms my heart when I’m able to help change someone else’s life for the better. I’m not even sure that I will ever understand how me just being myself is helping so many other people, but it always make me feel so happy.
That’s one of the reasons why I love this job...