Post by A Ghost Now on Aug 27, 2014 23:22:50 GMT -6
(You like the rhyme? No? Well, my deepest apologies… it only goes downhill from here.)
"One, two. One, two. One, two. One, two!"
Max said to himself as he boxed with the air of a run-down gym in the tattered squared ring it had.
"Am I doing it right?"
"Not at all." Said Sally, a longtime friend of the Disaster's. The reason he went to this woman was because she always knew how to knock the guys out.
Literally.
"Honestly... why are trying to learn how to punch? To box? Aren't you good enough on your legs?" She asked Max, who was better off with his kicks and knees than he was with his arms and hands.
"Because... I could use the practice... and mostly because I want to be able to match my rival." Max said, leaning on the ropes and looking down to his partner. ... before the ropes gave out and he fell face-first right in-front of her shiny pair of heels.
"Your... rival?" She asked, confused by the word.
"Yeah, by the name of Patrick Jones." Max said happily with a smirk on his lips.
"YOU'RE REPLACING ME, HUH?!" Sally did not sound happy at that...
"Huh? W-wait! N-no, it's not like that! I was kidd-"
... Max did not wake up for a day after Sally knocked him out with a heavy haymaker... into the steel pole of the rusted ring. By the time he did wake up, he was asleep... on the floor of Sally's cheap apartment with her heels digging into his back. "... Do you mind?" Max asked frankly, looking up to her with the migraine he had.
"No, not at all~ Or else you wouldn't be my footrest." She said happily, flipping through the channels.
Max sighed and slowly squirmed out from under her before flopping next to her on the couch with a hand on the bruised part of his skull. "Still broke, I see? Daddy still cutting you off after a year or two?"
Sally shrugged, "Yeah, but I make do. I have a career."
"Waitwaitwait... you WORK!?" To those just joining this... exciting story, Sally's profits mostly included the ludicrous amounts of money that her father gave her. In all twenty-five years of her life, she had never lifted a finger to do any actual work.
"Yeah, as a bounty hunter! Isn't that exciting? No more cheap wrestling in some mexican whorehouse like you used to do! I have a REAL calling!!" She sounded so excited to the job. Max honestly would not be damned to be excited by the idea.
"I... honestly am not surprised. All you have to do is take your freakishly overpowered hands and bash someone's face inside-out and collect a reward. Hell, you basically do that without getting paid anyway."
"YES, BUT I GET PAID NOW IS THE POINT!"
"... you are a dumbass... know that?"
"Yes, well, my salary is better than yours right now, is it not?"
"... shut up."
Sally giggled happily. "Now... what's this about a rival?"
"Are you going to knock me out this time?"
"Debateable. I will if you don't speak up, so it's lose-potentially lose either way."
Max rolled his eyes and begun to speak. "We're not really rivals, I suppose... but last I checked, Patrick Jones and I are at a standstill of 1 win apiece. As such... I suppose this is our tiebreaker and finale from the duels in NEW."
"So... you're trying to train to match him when you've beaten him once before, then?"
"Yeah."
"Then why train? I mean.. if you beat him before... why bother trying to learn something new?"
"BECAUSE HE'LL EXPECT THE SAME THING! So... I fake him out... and punch him around the ring!"
"... you do realize you've wasted a week training and the instant you try to go in for a punch against him, he's probably just going to knock you out with a superkick... right?"
Max stared at Sally long and hard before looking down at his hands. "I... did not think this out through, did I?"
"Not at all. So, you might as well just go in how you did last time and hope that you kick his ass... or that he slips up and you somehow win." Sally reached over to a table next to the couch and took a sip of soda from a cheap Circle K cup.
"... I guess so."
"One, two. One, two. One, two. One, two!"
Max said to himself as he boxed with the air of a run-down gym in the tattered squared ring it had.
"Am I doing it right?"
"Not at all." Said Sally, a longtime friend of the Disaster's. The reason he went to this woman was because she always knew how to knock the guys out.
Literally.
"Honestly... why are trying to learn how to punch? To box? Aren't you good enough on your legs?" She asked Max, who was better off with his kicks and knees than he was with his arms and hands.
"Because... I could use the practice... and mostly because I want to be able to match my rival." Max said, leaning on the ropes and looking down to his partner. ... before the ropes gave out and he fell face-first right in-front of her shiny pair of heels.
"Your... rival?" She asked, confused by the word.
"Yeah, by the name of Patrick Jones." Max said happily with a smirk on his lips.
"YOU'RE REPLACING ME, HUH?!" Sally did not sound happy at that...
"Huh? W-wait! N-no, it's not like that! I was kidd-"
... Max did not wake up for a day after Sally knocked him out with a heavy haymaker... into the steel pole of the rusted ring. By the time he did wake up, he was asleep... on the floor of Sally's cheap apartment with her heels digging into his back. "... Do you mind?" Max asked frankly, looking up to her with the migraine he had.
"No, not at all~ Or else you wouldn't be my footrest." She said happily, flipping through the channels.
Max sighed and slowly squirmed out from under her before flopping next to her on the couch with a hand on the bruised part of his skull. "Still broke, I see? Daddy still cutting you off after a year or two?"
Sally shrugged, "Yeah, but I make do. I have a career."
"Waitwaitwait... you WORK!?" To those just joining this... exciting story, Sally's profits mostly included the ludicrous amounts of money that her father gave her. In all twenty-five years of her life, she had never lifted a finger to do any actual work.
"Yeah, as a bounty hunter! Isn't that exciting? No more cheap wrestling in some mexican whorehouse like you used to do! I have a REAL calling!!" She sounded so excited to the job. Max honestly would not be damned to be excited by the idea.
"I... honestly am not surprised. All you have to do is take your freakishly overpowered hands and bash someone's face inside-out and collect a reward. Hell, you basically do that without getting paid anyway."
"YES, BUT I GET PAID NOW IS THE POINT!"
"... you are a dumbass... know that?"
"Yes, well, my salary is better than yours right now, is it not?"
"... shut up."
Sally giggled happily. "Now... what's this about a rival?"
"Are you going to knock me out this time?"
"Debateable. I will if you don't speak up, so it's lose-potentially lose either way."
Max rolled his eyes and begun to speak. "We're not really rivals, I suppose... but last I checked, Patrick Jones and I are at a standstill of 1 win apiece. As such... I suppose this is our tiebreaker and finale from the duels in NEW."
"So... you're trying to train to match him when you've beaten him once before, then?"
"Yeah."
"Then why train? I mean.. if you beat him before... why bother trying to learn something new?"
"BECAUSE HE'LL EXPECT THE SAME THING! So... I fake him out... and punch him around the ring!"
"... you do realize you've wasted a week training and the instant you try to go in for a punch against him, he's probably just going to knock you out with a superkick... right?"
Max stared at Sally long and hard before looking down at his hands. "I... did not think this out through, did I?"
"Not at all. So, you might as well just go in how you did last time and hope that you kick his ass... or that he slips up and you somehow win." Sally reached over to a table next to the couch and took a sip of soda from a cheap Circle K cup.
"... I guess so."
