Post by Satoko on May 22, 2015 22:27:36 GMT -6
Breakthrough Edition 26 - What You Didn't See
Mattaki glances around Project Snakehead's locker room almost feeling
dirty as he checks out the Karaoke equipment. It all looked top of the
line but that wasn't the problem, the problem was he just wasn't
interested in it. If it hadn't been for Neptune then he probably would
have told Tanaka to shove it, but how could he say no to that smiling
monkey face? HOW? He couldn't so he took a seat in a nearby chair as he
watched Neptune fool around with the karaoke machine with one hand while
holding the mic in another. Dai and Taro looked on from their seats on
the other side of the room and Tanaka stood at the middle of the room
with what could only be described as a super villain expression on his
face. Finally the opening chords of Taylor Swift's “Shake it off” started to play,
Mattaki knew what it was right away because he has had to sit through it
a million times. Neptune's taste in music was…. Well…. Gay, it was
fucking gay! There was really no other way to say it, if you asked
people what kind of music the world thought gay people listened to,
you'd get exactly what Neptune likes. Mattaki hated it, he was never
interested in pop bullshit but he tried to tolerate it for Neptune.
Neptune: I stay up too late
Got nothing in my brain
That's what people say
That's what people say
I go on too many dates
But I can't make them stay
At least that's what people say
That's what people say
Without even looking at the screen of the karaoke machine Neptune starts
belting out the lyrics. Dai and Taro listen excitedly while Tanaka's
expression has morphed from super villain to full on Grinch. You can
practically see the dollar signs in his eyes as he watches Neptune dance
around while still hitting every note perfectly. A smile even creeps
across Mattaki's face because while he still thought the music was
bad, he always liked to see Neptune do well and he could tell that his
monkey was killing it. Well, killing it as much as you can kill it when
it comes to mindless pop trash of course. Everyone continues to watch
Neptune who never messes up one note or one lyric and before they know
it the song comes to an end. All of them rise to their feet giving the
surprisingly whimsical lightning monkey a standing ovation.
Dai: That…. Was…. AWESOME!
Taro: Yeah Neptune, I never knew you were so good.
Tanaka: Neptune my boy, I have two words for you, Japanese Idol.
Neptune: Oh, like American Idol? Can't I just do American Idol?
Mattaki rubs Neptune's head, messing up his hair.
Mattaki: No monkey, not a talent show. He's talking about those pop stars that
everybody goes nuts for in Japan. He's also out of his mind since you
can't even speak Japanese much less sing songs in Japanese.
Neptune: FALSE!
Neptune clears his throat.
Neptune:Koko Soko Asoko
Where are you, my heart?
Koko Soko Asoko
Where are you, my heart?
Koko Soko Asoko
Can't find you in the dark
Dai, Taro, and Tanaka clap excitedly while Mattaki buries his face in his palm.
Mattaki: And what does that mean?
Neptune: Um… Well… koko is obviously short for coconut right? Soko is when you
get somebody else wet, and asoko is when you get yourself wet of course.
Mattaki: Ladies and gentlemen, the defense rests.
Neptune: What? I was close right? RIGHT?
Mattaki shakes his head but he can't help grinning a bit.
Tanaka: Come on Mattaki, you're starting to teach him Japanese right? Surely
with you as a teacher he'll be speaking Japanese in no time.
Mattaki: That's not the point.
Tanaka: Yes, you're right, I mean he doesn't even need to speak Japanese to be
able to sing it! I know tons of writers who would love to work with him.
I mean he has the sound and he has the look, oh does he ever have the
look.
Mattaki glares at Tanaka.
Mattaki: Are you hitting on my monkey?
Tanaka: You know what I mean, he was born to be an idol Mattaki, I'll be rich!
Neptune rolls his eyes.
Neptune: We'll…..
Tanaka: Yeah, that's what I said.
Mattaki: Sure it was. Anyway, I've heard horror stories of the music labels
treating those idols as nothing more than prisoners or property so
excuse me if I'm not jumping for joy to see Neptune put in that
situation.
Tanaka: Mattaki, I'm surprised at you, normally you're all over this type of thing! How could you not know how influential that Asia Powwa records is over in Japan?
Mattaki: Because I usually read up on things that actually matter instead of
filling my mind with things that revolve around pop trash?
Tanaka: Regardless, Asia Powwa records has a strong grip on the music industry in Japan and since you're already signed with me, things wouldn't be too much different than they are now. Well, except instead of wrestling you guys would be singing and making a lot more money. Wait, Mattaki, you can
sing too can't you?
Mattaki: What? Of course I can, prepare to be amazed!
Mattaki stomps over to the karaoke machine while Tanaka, Dai, and Taro look on.
For some reason Neptune is blushing as he watches, he's most likely
thinking about how cool Mattaki looks. Mattaki stands at the karaoke
machine pressing buttons for what seems like an eternity.
Mattaki: What the hell is with this thing? THEY'RE ALL POP SONGS!
Dai: Well yeah boss, that's usually what karaoke is all about.
Taro: Exactly, most people don't have your taste in music boss.
Mattaki: Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it.
Tanaka: Yeah, yeah, Aristotle, make with the singing.
Mattaki raises his eyebrows at Tanaka
Mattaki: I'm sorry, all I heard you say was that you had a death wish. Would you like to repeat that?
Tanaka quickly shuts up fearing for his life and Mattaki begrudgingly goes
back to trying to find something that suits him but still can't. He just
shakes his head and finally just picks something. After a couple of
moments the karaoke machine starts playing Ariana Grande's “One Last
Time”. Mattaki with the mic in his hand stares down the screen of the
karaoke machine looking for the lyrics.
Mattaki: I was a liar
I gave in to the fire
I know I should've fought it
At least I'm being honest
Feel like a failure
'Cause I know that I failed you
I should've done you better
'Cause you don't want a liar
Mattaki is able to belt out all of the lyrics however his singing has the
direct opposite effect on everybody than Neptune's did. Tanaka looks as
though somebody just destroyed his favorite piggy bank while Dai and
Taro fake grin trying not to draw Mattaki's ire. It looks as though
Neptune is trying to do the same thing but it doesn't seem to be
working, it looks like he's trying to smile while his soul is being
pulled from his body through his ears. Mattaki keeps right on singing
and what seems like 30 minutes later, he finally finishes the song and
defiantly drops the mic.
Mattaki: WOOOO! Suck on that! Go ahead, tell me how great I was.
Neptune: Awesome job Mattaki!
Dai and Taro whispering.
Dai: I think he's tone deaf.
Taro: Me too.
Neptune slaps both of them on the back and then speaks through gritted teeth.
Neptune: Tell him how great he was guys.
Dai: Oh, you blew the roof off the place boss!
Taro: That's right, I never knew you were so musically gifted!
Tanaka: Mattaki my boy….
Neptune glares at Tanaka giving him a throat slash motion.
Tanaka: THAT WAS HORRIBLE!
Neptune: TANAKA!
Mattaki looks down at the ground and then back up Tanaka.
Mattaki: How bad are we talking about here? Like Justin Beiber bad?
Tanaka: William Hung bad.
Mattaki: Right, let's never speak of this again, I'm going to go warm up for our match now.
Mattaki walks out of the locker room and Neptune starts to follow him but Tanaka stops him.
Tanaka: Just remember Neptune, you could still be an idol, think about it.
Tanaka pats Neptune on the back before Neptune walks out after Mattaki.
~Roar of the Dragon~
"So go ahead, keep running things how you're running them and see how long you last once word starts to spread about what is really going on. The whole “pay no attention to what's going on behind the curtain, the people who are leaving are just quitters” act will only last so long" - Mattaki Fukushuu
That would be a clip from the first promo that I recorded here in VOW. I was ripping the federation I had just left a new one and making a prediction of what I saw as an inevitability due to the way they conducted business. Well a couple of weeks ago that federation did just as I said it would and closed its doors. You see when I say something I'm not just talking out of my ass and I'm not just saying it in order to make myself look good. No, I'm saying it because that's the way I see it playing out and while I may not be a psychic, I'm pretty damn close. Aside from calling the demise of a shit promotion with shady business tactics , I've also broken down each and every opponent I've faced and told you exactly why they would fall at the hands of Project Snakehead. Each time people doubted me and each time my words rang true. So the question is will this time be different? Will this be the time that I'm finally proven wrong and Project Snakehead finally falters? NO!
Not really a surprising answer but the reason I'm saying no might be. You see usually when facing somebody I've already beaten they are the ones trying to convince the world how much things have changed while I'm pointing out how full of shit they are. For the most part there usually isn't a whole lot of change that happens between facing an opponent and then having to face them again unless a ton of time has passed. There are of course exceptions like there is with the match between Project Snakehead and the Gang Stars at Fate of the Gods. The only problem is what has changed doesn't benefit the Gang Stars, no, it benefits Project Snakehead. I mean think about it people, who is it that you've seen on Breakthrough dominating every week since we got here? Project Snakehead. Now, think about the Gang Stars, when was the last time you saw them compete? That would be the 24th edition of Breakthrough which means by the time the Gang Stars climb into the ring to defend their titles against Project Snakehead at Fate of the Gods, over a month will have passed since the last time they even had a fucking match. Yeah, not only is classifying them as “champions” highly questionable, they don't seem to do a whole lot of “fighting” either do they? As a matter of fact I'm surprised that nobody else noticed how curious the match-up of Zui Zhong and Patrick Jones Vs Project Snakehead actually was. Granted, no matter what match we're put in, it's going to draw interest because we're in it. Still, in that situation the front office is usually jizzing all over the place at the mere thought of throwing together a champion vs champion match. However it wasn't the twin city champions who got the nod to face the zero gravity champion and his contender. Nah, it was Project Snakehead. So what that tells me is that as far as VOW is concerned the Gang Stars are already dead and buried. But honestly who can blame them? When the two words that describe everything your champions do are “shitty and forced” then it's really no mystery as to why the spotlight is shining down on Project Snakehead instead of them.
We told you, we told every last one of you as soon as we walked in the door that we were going to show you what a real tag team looked like and we've done it. A real tag team climbs into the ring every week and destroys everybody who is put in front of them. Let's forget for a moment that the Gang Stars lost to us, and let's forget for a moment that the Gang Stars don't even have what it takes to actually compete every week. Yeah, I know, it's like asking a Jew to forget the holocaust, a Japanese person to forget the atomic bombings, and an American to forget 9/11 but give it a shot. Let's hop in our pretend mobiles and take a magical trip down gum drop lane where Unicorns shit rainbows. That's right, it's a place where the Gang Stars didn't lose to us, they don't act like they're allergic to stepping inside of a ring, and it's a place where if they work really hard for a month even the Gang Stars can overcome their severe noskillitus to actually become good wrestlers. So of course in this magical alternate reality the Gang Stars would have a chance to beat us right? Maybe, but shouldn't the fact that I had to omit so many things about them and create an alternate universe in order to even give them a chance at winning tell you something? Oh we're cocky, arrogant, or whatever else you want to call it but Project Snakehead is also real. We're not perfect, we have lost in the past and we'll lose again in the future but as I look out across the current landscape of VOW, I honestly don't see where that loss is coming from. Forget the Gang Stars, I don't see a team on the roster right now who can stand toe to toe with Project Snakehead and come out on top.
Quite frankly, I don't think that's a bad thing. We're here to elevate the Twin City division and VOW along with it. Yeah, I know, most people don't like us but that's the truth. I mean right now it's like most of the VOW fan base has fucking Stockholm Syndrome. Oh the Gang Stars are funny, they're entertaining, etc. etc. etc. But tell me this, are the Gang Stars good wrestlers? Are they a good team? Are they capable of beating Ziu Zhong and Patrick Jones? Or are they a couple of frauds who are where they are due to sub par competition and getting free pass after free pass from all of you who REFUSE to demand more from them just because they're funny. You deserve better, VOW deserves better, and Project Snakehead is going to give you better whether you like it or not. Actually scratch that, we're going to give you better whether you admit that you like it or pretend that you don't. The moment that Project Snakehead is crowned the Twin City Champions, everything is going to change. You know when you wake up in the morning to find that you can hardly breathe so you jam your finger in your nose and pull out a booger the size of a Chihuahua? I don't because I use tissues like a civilized human being but I'm sure the feeling is still similar. Once your nose is clear you feel a million times better than you did when you first woke up, same thing here. The Gang Stars are the boogers clogging the nostrils of the VOW and once they're removed, everybody is going to feel a million times better. You may not be able to smell it right now but you'll be able to smell it very soon. It's change, and it's the sweetest fragrance in the world.
